Living in Truth

If you have spent any time getting to know me, you will have heard about the anxiety I experience around flying. It has always seemed like a cruel joke to me that God would call me to serve cross-culturally and that I would struggle with deep fear regarding air travel. In 2014, I took 23 flights alone and traveled to 8 different countries.

Over the last twenty years, I have prayed repeatedly for God to release me from my fear of flying. I

have explored the Scriptures, meditated on truth, and tried all kinds of practical remedies, but I have never found relief.

In the days leading up to my December 16^th flight, I felt my anxiety building. I shared it with a few different people and asked them to pray with me. I identified that it was an irrational fear, but one that seemed to hold me captive anyway. As I lay down to sleep on the night of December 15^th, I again asked God to release me from this anxiety and fear. Suddenly, a picture came to mind of the woman who had been bleeding for twelve years who came up behind Jesus in the crowd and touched His robe; full of faith that if she touched His robe, she would be healed (Mark 5:25-34).

As I played this story out in my head, peace came over me. I could identify with the woman’s desperation to be healed and her belief that only Jesus held the answer to her healing. I believed in that moment I had been set free from my fear and anxiety related to flying.

The next morning, I was reflecting more on this woman’s story. I wondered if she ever was afraid the bleeding would return. How did this woman live out her healing? I realized that even though I had been set free from my fear, I still had to make the choice to live in that truth.

It reminded me of the truth of our salvation. The truth is that I have been forgiven from my sins and live before God as one without sin. My position in Christ is secure. However, sometimes, I choose to live outside of this truth. Either I choose to sin or I choose to live under condemnation, neither of which reflect the truth of my life.

I believe I have been healed and freed from my anxiety and fear regarding flying. However, I still have the choice whether I will live in that truth or retreat into doubt and fear. In my last four flights, I have chosen to live in the truth of my new freedom. My continued prayer is that I will learn to walk in truth, both in regards to my fear and my salvation.